For Poe's Law's sake

Has anyone noticed how Jerry Seinfeld's show was a warning about socialism?

For example: When George became stronger Elaine became a pushover parasite.  Kramer never seemed to have a job, but lived the high life with a very nice Manhattan apartment.  How could he have afforded this?  Was Kramer living on Section 8 Vouchers and collecting a type of SNAP benefits?  If it wasn't the drug or sex trade I have to wonder how an adult could make a living acting like Kramer did.

The warning signs were all there.  They had the episode where the car was literally torched for parking in a disabled spot.  They had the episode about the Puerto Rican Day Parade that cut them off from their own world.  George even managed to injure a Boy In a Bubble while attempting to help him.  It was like a blueprint for the future of the Obamacare plan.

Even the subtle background details included vague hints of future liberalism.  Jerry had a bike hanging in his apartment, and an Apple computer.  A man who is strict about the rules on his private property in his own business is mocked as being a Soup Nazi.  The entire "Not there there's anything wrong about that" "joke"?  The phrase "Cartwright, party of four" is a joke instead of taking PC just too far.

What was the world coming to in the 1990's, when this was acceptable as a "SitCom" for parents to watch with their children?

Portland Streetcar leader gets Obama Promotion

Chandra Brown was just appointed to be the U.S. Commerce Department's deputy assistant secretary for manufacturing.  That's good for her, but United Streetcar, the company she was just head of (as President since 2007 and CEO since January), has delivered one streetcar to Portland and it's not even in operation.  That's the payback for the city that basically sponsored them existing as a division of Oregon Iron Works.  Right now there is a backorder of the entire set Portland was expecting to open their Eastside Loop with.

Even worse for Tucson, AZ is that they're waiting for a set of streetcars as well.  These aren't some crazy new design that's never been tested either.  These are a Czech design that's been used successfully, but apparently it's a little tougher to use licensed blueprints than it might sound.

I have to wonder how a company that hasn't actually delivered anything they promised gets promoted to a cabinet appointment?  How does a company with such a failing record end up with their CEO getting this kind of promotion?

"This is my coffee table, his name is Dave"

Hi there, my name is Dave.  I'd like to be your coffee table.  Or lamp.  Or, if you're an artist, your signature project.

The problem might be, is it legal to license the use of a dead human who is properly preserved for artistic reasons?

I've realized I probably won't mind if I don't have my body anymore after I die.  I don't plan on doing so anytime soon, but when it does happen I don't want to just get thrown away, recycled, or just put in a compost pile.  So, what is there to do with a Dave?

Well, maybe I could be a coffee table, or otherwise a piece of art.    I'd bet with some properly bolted in metal plates I could be part of an awesome bookshelf or workbench.  Since I was a...  Maybe a teenager?  It's been a while, but anyway, I've thought it would be funny to be encased in plastic either on my back like a stranded turtle, or on my hands and knees with a table top attached so I could become a coffee table.

Maybe that's too simple, and I could be made into a lamp that could change my appearance with the seasons simply by dressing up my preserved corpse?  It's not like I'll need it by then.

For the right price, maybe I could become a trophy.  It really won't matter if it's after I'm dead, which is pretty much the only way I'll accept any negotiations for the trade in of my body.

But, if anyone wanted to buy a license to use my image, including after death, as well as the rights to the source material I'd be happy to consider negotiating a license to use my leftovers when I'm gone in the most entertaining and profitable way possible.

In the long, long run, like, once I've been dead for fifty years, for it to end up in a museum, which is why I would prefer it to just be a license to use my body until I become a more long term art project for the public to appreciate.

If anyone has ideas about how they'd like to license a Dave please feel free to contact me; just have creative ideas for the first free range Dave as well as a lawyer with some idea for how I can rent my not-quite rotting remains to you when I'm gone.  (Which, if you really are serious, you'll need a serious long-term plan.  I'm only in my 30's now, so it might be a while before your vision can be achieved.  I have to be kind of done with this body first.)

The PATRIOT Act was passed because as a nation we were scared.  Maybe we should all just take a few deep breaths and look at this as a complex problem that knee-jerk reactions won't fix.

There are definitely problems with gun accessibility for the suspected mentally ill in this country.  Harris and Klebold had both been court-ordered into psychiatric care.  Virginia Tech?  Well, Cho was diagnosed with a severe anxiety disorder before the attack.  Loughner was kicked out of college for being too crazy for people to feel comfortable around him, and campus police and the administration removed him until he had a psych exam (which his parents didn't bother with.)  Holmes was referred to police for saying he was going to kill people.  Adam Lanza it seems everyone but his mom realized was a bit off.  It just goes on and on.  There were red flags waving everywhere, but people just ignored them.

The Columbine kids found a straw purchaser.  VT guy had no record because it's really tough to put one on someone who has never committed a crime, even if everyone around them things they're crazy.  Loughner was a case of the college trying to wash its hands, just like Holmes.  With Lanza the issues appear more complex, but he stole guns that his mom left accessible to him even though everyone around him knew something wasn't right with him.  I'll even point out the Clackamas Town Center shootings were done by someone who stole a gun from a friend who most likely didn't secure it well.  The Aurora shooter (Holmes) is the most pathetic case of the system failing, since his doctor alerted police, but apparently once he dropped out nobody cared to follow up.

So, maybe we should be looking at how we find a way to respond to tons of people seeing red flags but not reporting any of them rather than jump at a quick and easy solution that would be unlikely to actually prevent mentally ill people with severe anger issues from killing a lot of people.

Pedobear in Portland

KPTV in Portland has a story tonight about some cars that teenagers hit with rocks thrown from overpasses of I-205.  One of the victims has Pedobear on his hood. (The picture is from 1 min 11 sec into the video.)

Is this real?

Is this real?

I have no idea.  I was told that this came from a scanned picture taken on 9/11 by someone who sent it to someone who just put a link to it.  I cropped it slightly, but I've never seen this angle before.  I don't know if it's real, but if it is...

Wow.

The future of technology (Part 2)

To follow up my previous post about the future of transportation technology, mass transit and car ownership becomes part of the equation.  While a bus can be more energy efficient, if self-driving cars powered by renewable technology at charging stations becomes an economical way to transport people, at what point do mass transit and personal ownership of an automobile become obsolete?

Some people will want to drive, at least for the next few decades.  Eventually who is to say it won't become the equivalent of enjoying riding a horse as time passes?  What practical need is there for wanting to drive instead of be driven?

Obviously the transition will take some time, but what might things be in a few decades if the self-driving car in combination with improved battery technology mixed with improved engine efficiency?

The carshare model and artificial intelligence mixed with a need to recharge, in addition to improved charging technologies could easily be leading to a situation where you request a car by internet, phone, or some currently unknown technology, and a car pilots itself from the charging location to you, picks you up, and takes you to your destination.  Take it as a mix of a cab, a carshare, and a carpool all into one.

With improved AI it would be possible for such a system to respond to peak demands and have cars near employment centers at the end of a shift, outside schools at the end of the school day, near major events after a big game finishes, or stationed outside a mall during a busy shopping season.

The ways this would change the American lifestyle would be quite profound.  Parking lots would be changed forever, high speed rail, mass transit, and even many flights would be obsolete.

Maybe autonomous cars won't be going 100+ mph in the next twenty years, but eventually on grade separated roads like the Interstate Highway System it could be reasonable to ban human driven vehicles in order to increase the throughput of the roads in addition to increase the speed to rates that are unthinkable with a human driver.

Nobody can predict the future, but some parts of the future are here today.  Maybe we should plan for them.

A cat toilet

I don't know why, but I clicked on this ad:

Never Touch Litter Again
Self-Flushing, Self-Washing Cat Box As Clean as Your Cat

If you have a cat, and don't really like it too much, you should probably look at investing in a CatGenie.  It's a toilet, for your cat.  I wish I was joking.

There's a video explaining how it all works on their web site, but I have to wonder what kind of freak would buy this thing starting at $249.00.  Maybe you can fit it with a Brawndo connector.

The future of technology

It's an interesting time that we live in.  With the opening of the new East Side Loop of the Portland Streetcar, I've been thinking about how transportation technology has changed the American landscape over the years.  Transportation alone has so many up and coming technologies that when you look back to a hundred years ago, it's difficult to imagine how much might change in the next hundred years.

The streetcar era of the late 1800s and early 1900s built cities.  It helped shape the core of most of the American west, and helped create suburbs all over the country.  Portland's suburbs were built around the interurban trains of the era, starting with horse drawn streetcars, through the electrification era, and eventually replaced them with buses.  It's a common story from San Diego to Seattle.

But Portland has brought the streetcar back to America.  With cities like Tucson, Washington DC, LA and more looking at building new systems Portland has put ourselves in a unique place with Oregon Iron Works subsidiary United Streetcar being in our own backyard.

But is the pro-train, anti-freeway plan for Portland the best long term option?  Is the situation Portland has created of hoping people will use mass transit really the best option with the technology that it seems could be commonplace in the future?

Google is working on the autonomous car which currently has 480,000 accident free miles under its belt.  Between that and improved battery technologies, at what point will a self-driving plug in hybrid that gets 200+ mpg hit the market?  There are hurdles to overcome to achieve that, but if that happens, and it seems possible, what will that mean for the market of high speed rail, mass transit, or even cab drivers?

It seems that we're about to face a change in the way transportation is handled in multiple ways in a short period of time.  Will cities that have favored investments in mass transit as opposed to highway capacity regret their decisions as these changes occur?

There is the possibility that because of increased efficiency of roadways with self-driving vehicles you can fit more vehicles on the roadway, but you have to wait until there are enough self-driving vehicles that you can ban human driven vehicles from the freeway.  At that point if the systems are advanced enough, why not get rid of speed limits and just let anyone with a self driving car go as fast as the car decides it can safely go?

If the car can go 130 mph, that also raises questions about the need for high speed rail.  With station stops how much demand will their be?

It will also destroy the cab driving industry, the rental car industry, and drastically reshape the insurance industry.  If automated vehicles become popular enough why would someone even buy their own car?  Just pay a fee for miles traveled and take a cab/rental (same business once you remove the driver) and pay as you go.

Given that a hundred years ago the idea of taking a vacation on a long weekend to the opposite coast was considered crazy, maybe we should start trying to pay better attention to the technologies that are going to be sneaking up on is in the coming decades.  While many people enjoy driving a car, we should be also planning for how we accommodate cars of the future.

The circle of pro-life

Mitt Romney's campaign just keeps giving.  The whole fiasco with Todd Akin just becomes a little more amusing when you realize that Gov. Romney, who was trying to get Akin to withdraw from the race earlier today, was also supported by and had acting as a surrogate a Dr. Jack C. Willke back in his 2008 campaign.  From the linked LA Times article:

A physician and former president of the National Right to Life Committee, Willke was an “important surrogate” for Romney’s 2008 presidential bid. Willke is the oft-cited source of the theory that rape-related pregnancies are “rare.” The theory is sometimes used by antiabortion advocates to argue that abortion laws should not contain exceptions for pregnancies that result from rape or incest.

But wait, there's more!  The National Right to Life Committee?  That sounds familiar.  Oh, it's the same one that Paul Ryan has a perfect rating from in his years representing Wisconsin.  He's never voted against them.  Between that and the Ryan-Akin Anti-Abortion Bill, well, this is all coming full circle quite quickly.  Especially since the National Right to Life Committee just endorsed Gov. Romney April 12, 2012. 

Update: Kirk Cameron has now weighed in.

Hospital Corporation of America, or HCA, or DOA

So, the NY Times has run some pieces about HCA lately.  They're kind of hit pieces, and some of the Republican blogs and papers have been jumping on it.  HCA is also known as Hospital Corporation of America.  This wouldn't be an issue if Bain Capital didn't own 40% of them.  You know, that company that Mitt Romney founded?  If Rick Scott hadn't been the CEO at one point it would also be slightly less interesting.

So, anyway, the NY Times ran this piece.  Some highlights:

HCA’s emergence as a powerful leader in the hospital industry is all the more remarkable because only a decade ago the company was badly shaken by a wide-ranging Medicare fraud investigation that it eventually settled for more than $1.7 billion. 

Why fix Medicare if you can bill for it right now?

In late 2008, for instance, HCA changed the billing codes it assigned to sick and injured patients who came into the emergency rooms. Almost overnight, the numbers of patients who HCA said needed more care, which would be paid for at significantly higher levels by Medicare, surged. 

Again, why screw up what works?  Maybe vouchers might be a way to pay for this while saving HCA some money, but the current formula seems like something not worth screwing up.

HCA decided not to treat patients who came in with nonurgent conditions, like a cold or the flu or even a sprained wrist, unless those patients paid in advance.

This falls in line with what we know about Romney.  Obviously it's a great cost cutting move.  He's a business genius or something for his dealings with Marriott.  After that, why would anyone doubt the man?

I mean, at least HCA didn't perform unnecessary surgery on...  Oh, crap.  They really did?  Well...

Why is it corporations can't end up in jail for committing crimes like unneeded surgeries for Medicare dollars?  I thought they were people?  If Bain owns you, you get out of jail free, even if you're kind of getting into the creepy area of cutting people up to make a few extra cents per share.

Oops she did it again

So, I saw a story this week on a website called Fark, and it was another typical Florida story.  Then I used the Googles.  This is kind of interesting.

Fark Link

Okay, so what does it mean.  Well:

"My daughter will choke me," says Debbie Piscitella, 41, mother of 9-year-old McKenna and 6-year-old Sebastian. "If I lose, I'm done. I might as well not even go home."

Wait, Debbie Piscitella?  That's familiar.  Like Fark recently found her again.

Oh, wait.  They did.  Oh, and her daughter MacKenna may have been involved.  The Florida tag proves its staying power again.

Memorial Day

This TV (2.2 in Portland) is running Final Approach.  Sci-Fi, but close to a war movie.  They're kind-of running something like Memorial Day.  Antenna TV (32.2) seems to be trying as well.  Otherwise, you have cable.


TC Guide Channel has something.  Charlie Wilsons War, and all you have to do is put up with the scrolling TV listings.  AMC also has some options, but History Channel?  Pawn Stars.

Car Crash on Holgate

Nice work Portland Police on handling this one.  It's only the second in a week, but I guess that's what happens when you live on a major Boulevard in Portland.

Mostly I'm just glad everyone (except the telephone pole) was okay.

If I had to drive past that every day I might want to hurt myself.  Or maybe others.

I really have to wonder who thought that is a motivational sign.

How far can you fall?

Neighborhoods

It's nice living in a decent neighborhood.  Just last night I witnessed a car collision where a young woman drove into the back of a large pickup.  I probably shouldn't say much more, but at least things seem to have worked out.

I do love my neighborhood though, because a bunch of people helped grab a broom and sweep up the plastic parts that were left in the intersection.  Even the Portland Police Officer seemed a little surprised.  (He seemed like a good guy, if anyone is wondering.)

At least nobody seemed to be hurt, and the kayaks looked like they could still float.

Trapped in the Bedroom

Sometimes the world likes to send a harsh message to people.  Sometimes it does it on a Friday night.  You probably know the feeling.  You want to grab a beer, maybe have a cigarette.  Of course the bathroom is calling.  But then, something gets in your way.

Maybe you turn your doorknob, and it pops off that metal post thingy, which falls out the other side.  At first you can stay calm.  Maybe an "oh shit" or three.  Maybe a "where the fuck is my cell phone?"

Then you realize that your phone is sitting on the living room table. The same table that your shoes are under.

There are options.

The windows are a little high off the ground, and I'm not sure that I'm not going to puncture my foot, and it had been raining for days.  What else can I do?

I then tried the multi-tool on my keychain.  It just can't quite get a grip, so what can be done?

I remember my wallet, and start trying to use a card from it to pop the latch.  I fortunately found an expired bonus card I broke in half instead of my debit card.

A few minutes later I found a wire coat hanger, and realized that if someone can perform an abortion with one of them, I better be able to open a door with one.  It took me a while, but eventually I found that perfect angle and rhythm to get my door open.

There are more useful things on the planet, but I'll make sure to keep a wire hanger with my towel.

Kayak

Link

If you're going to flip your kayak in the Willamette, apparently it's a good idea to make sure you're not going to drown.

Girl, 13, saves pets from burning home

Her house was on fire and she was home alone, but 13-year-old Max Foster knew just what to do.
“I was the only one and I was freaking out,” said Max. “I just took it step by step.”


I'm glad my rabbit never started a fire like that.